This tongue in cheek (kinda)

The Evolution of Motherhood

Your Clothes

* 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

* 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

* 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

The Baby's Name

* 1st baby: You pore over baby name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites.

* 2nd baby: Someone has to name his or her kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.

* 3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger points.

Preparing for the Birth

* 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

* 2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.

* 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette

* 1st baby: You cherish your newborn's clothes, color- coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

* 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

* 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries

* 1st baby: At the first sign of distress-a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.

* 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

* 3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Activities

* 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.

* 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

* 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

* 1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.

* 2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

* 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

* 1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

* 2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

* 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.